no title would work

God is so beyond words amazing. if that were to be my only thought ever i would be fine with that. as i sit here and reflect on where i am at in life i'm glad even with all the struggles. they're helping to form me into who God wants me to be and that's perfectly alright with me. even though it is extremely hard. i'm in love with my father, my creator. why can't i do all the things he wants and thinks i know i should do? why has he called me to do suck an amazing thing for him? i deserve none of this. why did God send his only son to do such a brutal, horrible, indescribable thing for us when all we do is turn our backs and slap him in the face and yet once again he turns is cheek? how come he loves us so indescribabley much? we are such unworthy people. we end up taking God for granted. we forget to be awe-struck and see how marvelous He is. He put everything where it is. He created everything. He gave us the thoughts to put things together to make others. even though we use them for us and not to glorify Him or we make wrong things. why do we sit here knowing all we know and not even making the effort to share it with others? why can i have the words for everything else i want to say but i can't for Him? is it a lack of vocabulary or is it He is so amazingly awesome that there are no words or both?