unspoken words

i thought a lot last night as i drove. it's so peaceful. there has been no fights except for childish arguments between the kids; which every sibling has at their age. the kids have more respect and act correctly without words to tell them or if needed you give them a glance and they know. how ridiculous is that with in a few weeks how things can change. i've been sleeping. i have not touched that collage of red bricks with my knuckles. i've eaten just about every meal. my mom sleeps in a bed. we eat together. we do things together. we go out together. i have a family that i love and would not want to change. oh how i love that. i have not raged with anger except for twice that i heard that mouth speak words that i so wanted to scream about. i have been able to do art without having to stop and come back because it hurts to much. and so much more. all of this is only given to us by my tremendously wonderful, beyond words or imagination; God. oh how i love Him. how i love that He whispers sweet sayings in my ear to get me through that day. how all of a sudden... BAM!... He has made me realize something that my simplistic mind could never comprehend with out Him. how i love that i can say Father and immediately without hesitation 'yes, my child' that i deserve none of this but yet He gives it to me and more. i could keep sitting here thinking of this is the game and these are the rules he is going to make up as we go along to go around the board one more time until we land safely at home but yet i have one thought of what God has done and i can't seem to hold back my smile and have to praise him for all that he has done. oh i love Him. and as much as i struggle He still lets me know Him and even more than that He invites me to know Him deeper. to stand next to Him. how awesome is that? mi Señor. yo me arrodillo en pies y le alabo para darlo a mí­. y para permitirme llamarle papi y para permitirme a aún le sabe.