.mis sentimientos.

i feel really good right now even though nothing out of the ordinary is really happening. i just feel... i feel just peaceful and at ease. even though there is so much more that i could be worrying about. i was thinking today i really have a heart for puerto rico. i've always realized it and i've always wanted to be there so badly. it's almost as if i longed for it and then today when i read jessica's post on russia i knew exactly how she was feeling. it spoke so true and real to me. it feels so comforting to think about it. i love the david crowder band! they are so awesome. i feel so at ease right now. i want to go driving around. i don't know where i just want to drive straight and just keep going and see where i end up at. just me and the empty road. nobody else. no other distractions. just peace. calmness. relaxation. new york... how i long to be back there. it's my home and always will be. no matter where i will be i will always consider that my home. that's where i feel the most relaxed. i know that may sound funny but i do. there is this comfort i get when i'm there. even though there is a thousand of problems and things that could be distracting me i'm in a great mood while i'm there. i know this is going to sound weird especially coming from me; i want to cry. tears of sorrow along side those tears of joy. which there seems to be no line right now. which is nice to feel that emotion for once. i may be rambling right now and if i am i'm sorry but this is how i am feeling. words are so amazing. just look at what God blessed us with. you look and see at how many words there are in our language and think that in so many other languages there is another word that is still really the same word. how amazing is that. i was watching harriet the spy this morning. don't ask me why i haven't watched that since i was 12 or 13 but i was. and there was one thing that i did like that they said in there. is that harriet wished she could see everything in the world and write down everything she saw and thought. i wish that were true that we would be able to do that but i know that is impossible. but if there were a compilation of my thoughts i wouldn't know where to look first or where to tell people what to read first. there is way to many and they never seem to be flowing with each other. i wish i were to be able to better describe what i think and feel but i seem to never be able to find the right words or the way to say it out loud it always seems to be stuck in my head for no one else to know except for myself. do you ever feel that way? lost in your own thoughts? no one to tell them to just because you don't seem to have the words to speak. or even sometimes you feel like you have a lack of vocabulary. there is so many wandering thoughts racing through my mind along side the millions of emotions that i'm feeling. i just don't know where to rest my head at. except for that pillow to dream about...